What I learnt from today’s shopping trip:

• Changing room attendants are more concerned by the possibility of you stealing a 50p belt than a £20 dress
• People with pushchairs are a menace
  
• Good parenting involves laughing as your child rips a clothing display down from the rail, then shouting at them when they start to cry
• Lots of people get dressed in the dark
• Clothing sizes tend to range from 4-8 and then 14-20; 10-12 just doesn’t exist
• 90% of the clothes I try on make me look like a potato
• Trying on dresses always leads to pulled shoulder muscles
• There is never anywhere to sit to try shoes on
• The name “Binky” apparently exists
• Clothing from the men’s section fits me better than the women’s
• I hate the general public

I am laughing so hard because my ex boyfriend’s new girlfriend has slept with more women than he has :’)